Do Black Men Hate Black Women’s Hair?

The subject of black women’s hair has always been a hot topic. Whether it’s the texture, the length or the overall look of our hair, there is always someone who has an opinion on the black woman and her hair. A few weeks ago, rapper Meek Mill was the latest individual to give his unwanted opinion on his dislike for women that wear wigs/weaves. Taking to his Twitter account, the 31 year old went on a rant tweeting; “Lace front wigs are wackkkk! I’m protesting them. I just hate when you see that lace cap line in front all slicked down and the net in the middle. We letting y’all have everything else …. ask y’all man how he feel lol.” He also made more time to say “In 2019 take them wigs off please”.

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Meek’s opinion had the wig/weavers in an uproar, protesting his comments. Naturally (excuse the pun), quite a few men agreed with the rappers comments, stating that they too can’t stand when a black woman isn’t wearing the hair that she was born with. Others said that it wouldn’t be so bad if the weaves that are worn was of the same texture as afro hair and not silky hair from Brazil. Then there were a few that surprisingly said that they don’t mind their girlfriends wearing wigs and weaves.

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Through the years, I have heard plenty of black men say they can’t stand weaves and they wish more black women would embrace their natural hair. But do black men really embrace our natural hair? Or do they actually prefer the long, silky hair that women of other races have? I spoke to Jason, a 32 year old black man who has dated girls who wore wigs and weaves. His overall opinion is that he doesn’t mind if a woman that he is dating isn’t wearing her real hair as long as it looks good.

Jason said “Me personally, it doesn’t bother me. As long as it looks correct. The only time it bothers me, is if they haven’t put any effort into it. Just wearing it for the sake of it. You can have the wig on but if you’ve got your track showing or it’s to one side…or the colours too bright and it doesn’t suit you as a person, that’s what you want but it’s got to look alright with it….obviously not everything’s gonna be real but you’ve gone out of your way to buy the hair, at least make it look good for your own appearance’.

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In the 60’s, the afro was in style, with most black men and women wearing it as their hairstyle. Wearing an afro I believe was also showcasing black pride, as much as black people were experiencing racism and injustice, they were black and proud and this was reflected in their choice of hairstyle. Also interestingly in that era, more black people were together in relationships. The 80’s was the curly perm era and the 90’s black women were straight perming their hair using chemicals other wise known as the ‘creamy crack’. In the 2000’s it became the era of the weaves and in the last few years, wigs have almost taken over wearing a weave. Writing this article has made me realise that as the hairstyles of black women went from the natural afro style in the 60’s when black people were more in relationships with each other to now when a lot of black women are wearing wigs and weaves, not only has the hairstyles changed but so has the relationship between black men and women.

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More than ever black men especially, (in the U.S and the U.K) are in interracial relationships. For a long time black women have been made to feel that white/mixed/latina women are more preferred over the black woman. In music videos of rnb singers and rappers, the choice of women are not of your average looking black woman, but no matter the race (including black) the women chosen all have long silky hair. In advertisements in particular in the U.K, it has been and still is mainly of white women. They have been put on the pedestal as the ideal of beauty. Of course this is going to have a huge impact on how black women are going to wear their hair if they feel that their natural hair isn’t deemed as beautiful or attractive.

As much as black men like Meek Mill complain about weave, I don’t see much of them with natural hair women (they do exist). I have even heard women that are natural complain that when they go out raving, it’s the girls with the long weaves that black men are going for and not the natural sistas.

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I remember when every time I had my hair done, as soon as I walked out of the hairdressers with a fresh long weave, I had black men falling over themselves to chat me up. If I had been walking down the road with an afro, would I have had the same reaction? I don’t personally think so but Jason disagrees;
“I think most guys would prefer a girl that is completely natural because they don’t wanna wake up one morning with a totally different person than who they went to bed with the night before. I don’t think black men would hate it If a woman’s wearing an afro, that’s her natural hair and how she looks, it’s down to the guy if (an afro) would attract them or not. If she’s nice, she’ll still get chatted up. If more black girls wore their natural hair, a lot of black guys would still chat them up because you need to remember, it’s about the body as well, not just the face”.

As much as wearing weaves and wigs is very much in fashion, in the last few years there has been a rise in black women embracing their natural hair and there is now a natural hair movement. On YouTube there are hundreds of videos that show women how to look after their natural hair and the sales of straight perm kits have gone down.
Personally I wear a weave and straighten my hair, I used to have a straight perm until I could literally see through my hair. I do plan on ditching the weaves and wearing my hair in it’s natural state. I’ve even found that when I wear my natural hair my energy feels a lot stronger than when I straighten it.

I believe that a lot of black women wear wigs/weaves for various reasons including; being conditioned to believe black hair is unattractive, a lot have even been told to change their hairstyle by their bosses at work, as their natural hair is seen as an unprofessional look. Some wear wigs and weaves because it’s an easy way to change their hairstyle/ colour/length. Some suffer from alopecia and wear wigs for their confidence. I also believe that black women either straighten their hair or wear weaves because they believe it is more appealing to black men. Ultimately black women embracing their natural hair, is down to them stepping away from the conditioning that black hair isn’t beautiful, accepting who they are and finally loving themselves.


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